Advice from the Pros: Dating Coach Erika Ettin

To help our users get the most out of online dating, we decided to get advice from the experts: professional matchmakers and dating coaches. We asked them 8 questions that we hope will give you some guidance in preparing an awesome online profile and succeeding in finding love online.

Our expert today is Erika Ettin, the founder and CEO of A Little Nudge, which helps online daters create profiles and craft emails that get amazing results (ie dates!).

Erika’s answers follow each question.

1. What are the first 3 questions men ask about potential dating partners?

Are we being honest here? If so, then it’s age, weight, and whether they have children. I’m not, however, saying I agree with these questions. I try to encourage all of my male clients (and female clients) to look past the superficial things and get to know someone for what’s inside.

2. What are the first 3 questions women ask about potential dating partners?

Age, occupation, and children.

3. What part of an online profile do you think is the most important for men? Women?

For women, it’s obviously the photo. Research shows that men use up to 65% more of their time viewing the profile’s photo when assessing a match.

For men, women care about the photo, the writing style, and the willingness/desire to have a long-term, serious relationship.

4. Is it ok for women to message men first?

Of course!! It’s 2014 – we go for what we want.

5. What are some big mistakes men make on their online profiles?


6. What are some big mistakes women make on their online profiles?

As we mentioned, photos are very important. I only recommend 3-5, not the 26 or even the 12 that other sites allow. Less is more.

7. Would you share an online dating success story you’ve been involved in?

Of course! I had a male client who is 5’3, which as we all know, is unfortunately very hard when searching for a date online. He was on a large Jewish dating site, and I helped him write his initial emails to at least 50 women. One of them stuck and he recently thanked me for getting him to his “last first date.” Cast a wide net. It just takes one.

8. What’s one piece of advice you’d share with all those looking for love online?

Things take time, but it’s so worth it in the end.

Thanks Erika for your super helpful insights and advice!

You can contact Erika here.

What do you think of Erika’s advice?

Please share your comments and questions below.

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