How Sorry Might Be Your Ticket to Relationship Success

With the Jewish Holiday of Yom Kippur, the day of atonement, quickly approaching I thought I’d share a true story which fits right into the theme of repentance and atonement.

A woman told me that she had agreed to go out on a date with a guy on a certain night (don’t remember what date number) but about an hour before the date she felt really ill and called to tell him that she would have to postpone. A few minutes later she received a text from the guy saying, “Betsy (obviously not her real name) F–ked me over.” It seems that the guy mistakenly sent Betsy the text that he had intended to send to his buddy. Bad mistake. But there’s still hope, right?

The guy then called Betsy and gave several explanations of why he mistakenly sent her the text. It was a foolish mistake, he was tired, frustrated, exasperated, disappointed, angry, stupid, yada, yada, yada. He asked her out again. She said no way. She told me why: he didn’t say he was sorry.

You see, Mr. Careless Texter tried to give every excuse in the book to explain his bad behavior, but he never actually apologized for what he said, or wrote, about Betsy. He was willing to admit his carelessness but not his rudeness and crudeness. All he had to do was say “sorry” and he would have been forgiven and given a second chance.

There are a couple of lessons we can learn from this story.

– Don’t say rude and crude things about anyone, especially someone who you really like. It’ll come back to haunt you. It always does.

– If you do something wrong, admit it and apologize. Sorry does not need to be the hardest word. The first thing that should come out of your mouth is, I’m sorry. Then take it from there.

Wishing you all a very meaningful and reflective Yom Kippur, and a happy, healthy, and successful new year.

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