Woman reject men

5 Reasons Women Reject Men [Hint: They’re all valid]

Women reject men for a variety of reasons which men, for the most part, just don’t understand. So men end up continuing on the same path that lead them to rejection and wonder why the same thing keeps happening to them. Why to women keep rejecting them?

So guys, here are 5 reasons why women reject men (and they’re all pretty valid).

1. Career Ambition

We all know that there are women out there who will only date men of a certain profession or net income. If you don’t fit their requirements, they won’t date you period. It’s not fair, but it’s their right, so you need to come to terms with that and adjust your target sights appropriately.

But let’s leave those women out for now. The majority of women do not have specific professional or financial requirements that need to be matched by the men they agree to date. Yes, they want a man who can make a living, but in many cases women are already making pretty hefty salaries so they’re less concerned with the final W-2 number.

What they do want is a man who shows stability and ambition in whatever he chooses to do. That means if you have a stable career path with room to grow, and you’re motivated to do so, you’ve probably succeeded in satisfying the requirement.

Some men are getting rejected because they cannot show a woman that they have a stable economic future. We’re not referring to someone who is currently unemployed as a result of the harsh economic cycle. Women understand that jobs come and go, and that a capable man will eventually be able to get another. It’s the men who seem to never have had a stable job or career and who don’t seem to be trying to improve their situation that makes women feel uneasy and unreceptive. Even men who are striving to build a business on their own can fall into this category if they’ve been doing it for too long without financial reward.

Guys, you could be the handsomest and smartest fellow in town but if you can’t show a woman that you have financial stability or the concrete potential for that in the very near future, your chances of dating and relationship success are substantially below the norm.

Solution: either get a real job or get involved in a real business that has potential to grow in the near future. Do it now, ASAP. You will drastically improve your dating prospects.

2. Reputation

If you’ve acquired a reputation for dating women seriously and then breaking up with them, women will be wary to date you and subject themselves to the same punishment. Everyone has relationships in their past that didn’t work out. But if you’ve done it enough times it isn’t unreasonable to assume that you’ve got some commitment related issues that need to be worked out before you can actually see a relationship through to commitment and marriage.

There are two steps you need to take to solve this dilema and clear your good name:

A. Work through your issue, preferably with the help of a therapist, mentor or coach. Maybe you can even work it out on your own. It doesn’t really matter how you do it, as long as you make sure not to get involved in another relationship until you do.

B. Once you’ve “cured” yourself, be honest with the woman you want to get involved with about your past and the work you’ve done to overcome your problem. Tell her that you know you’ve made mistakes before but now you’ve a new man who understands how to commit and is ready to do so. If you show you’re sincere and honest, the odds of her accepting you are good.

3. You’re abusive, insensitive, or just a big jerk.

This doesn’t require commentary. Grow up, be a man, and learn how to treat a woman. Don’t believe that crap about women not wanting to date nice guys. The kind of woman who you want as a wife will only date nice guys. Just remember, nice doesn’t equal wimpy. It means being caring, sensitive, attentive, and most of all giving.

reasons not to reject guy

4. You’re life goals are incompatible with her’s.

You need to share a common vision of how you want to lead your lives and raise a family. This includes religion, but not necessary politics.

5. She just doesn’t connect with your personality, or is not the least bit attracted to you.

Hey, it happens to the best of us. Not everyone is going to like you. Get used to it. Accept it, and move on.

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Why women shouldn’t reject men.

Now that I’ve told you why women reject men, it’s only fair that I balance it out with some reasons why they should.

There are certain things that women shouldn’t reject a guy over, because while those things might seem important in the dating stage they either aren’t or can be modified in a marriage.

Some might say that women should always give guys a chance and refrain from rejecting them until they are 110% positive that the guy isn’t the right one for them. While there is definitely merit in giving chances and being sure before acting, there are also scenarios where it’s pretty clear that a guy deserves getting that rejection slip.

There are certain items on your I Do List that are “must haves” and dealbreakers, which you shouldn’t compromise on. Also, going out on too many bad dates will drain you of your positive energy, which is so vital to dating success.

But some ladies go a bit overboard in the rejection department and write off potential matches for reasons that could be seen as shortsighted and irrelevant to a happy relationship. Remember, your goal is to be in a committed, happy relationship that will lead to marriage.

So here are some things that women should NOT reject a guy over.

1. His Clothing

On two separate occasions women I tried to set up rejected the men I suggested because they didn’t like the way they dressed. They felt the men weren’t “sharp” or cool enough for them because, admittedly, they were clueless in the clothing department. I told these women that I thought they were making a big mistake by rejecting these men who were both highly intelligent and successful professionals and really nice guys.

I guess living in big cities filled with metro-sexual, GQ reading men on the cutting edge of fashion trends can distort the reality: lots of great men are ignorant when it comes to style. They either don’t know or don’t care, so they continue to dress like college frat boys or revenge of the nerds extras. I can totally see how this can be a turn off to women who put so much effort into looking their best. But here’s the reason why it shouldn’t matter: most men will gladly upgrade their wardrobe for the right woman.

Most men would love for a woman to take them shopping and help them pick out clothes. In fact, they probably wouldn’t mind if you went shopping on your own and just brought them back stuff to wear. It’s that simple. In most areas you need to assume that a person will not change and you must accept them as they are. Clothing style for men is not one of them. Once you’re in a relationship you can style your man. So don’t reject a guy just because he can’t figure out what to wear!

2. His Home Furnishing

This is pretty similar to the clothing item. Most guys do not have the sense of style necessary to furnish an apartment or home that doesn’t look like a college dorm room or an Austin Powers bachelor pad. That’s where you come in, if you end up living in the same house (ie married). Keep that in mind, and look past the design design disaster to see the real man.

3. His Profession

Making a living and supporting a family is important. Being able to maintain an acceptable, and realistic, standard of living is too. But how a man accomplishes that feat is not important. Don’t judge a man by how he makes his living. Your goal should be to find a man who will be a loving and caring husband and father. The letters after his name should be irrelevant to your decision. Financial fortunes go up and down. Integrity, respect, caring and sensitivity remain forever.

4. His Social “Coolness”

Some men aren’t the greatest when it comes to socializing. I’m not referring to a man who is socially awkward in an uncomfortable or creepy way. I’m just talking about a guy who isn’t the social butterfly you think you need. If you marry him you’ll have to be the social director and lead the way in that department. Big deal. Are you looking for a PR pro or a loving partner?

5. His Lack of Verbal Expressions of Affection

There was a great article in the Wall Street Journal that talks about how some men show their love and affection in their actions instead of in their words. I know you want your man to serenade you with verbal expressions of his undying affection, but would you settle for a guy who washes the dishes, takes out the garbage and buys you flowers on a regular basis? How about a guy who wakes up early on weekends to take care of the kids so you can sleep in? Actions speak louder than words. Go for the doer over the talker every time.

Final Word

Women reject men for a wide variety of reasons. Some of those reasons are valid and men should take them to heart and use them as guidance to improve themselves. Some of the reasons for rejection don’t make a lot of sense, at least for women who are looking for a life partner and not just a short term boyfriend. So before you reject a man, make sure you’ve thought through your reasoning — and then read this article again.

If you need personal dating and relationship advice, you've come to the right place. To get answers to your specific questions or scenarios, click here.

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11 replies
  1. Paul
    Paul says:

    I’ve never approached a woman in my life no matter how attracted I am to her since it’s a given that she will not be attracted to me. Rejection (or worse) would always be guaranteed so there is no point in approaching. I’ve observed and even talked to guys who are successful with women – there is no way I can do what they do and I’m not about to risk a harassment accusation for saying hi.

  2. Doug
    Doug says:

    I couldn’t agree more that a woman has 100% discretion on rejecting any man for whatever reason she wishes to. I have never asked a woman out because rejection would always be guaranteed for some reason. So I don’t do it – guys are told that they should be almost certain a lady will say yes before asking, and that her body language and other little hints should communicate her intention. Since I never get signs, I am always sure the answer will be no, so I never ask.

  3. John
    John says:

    I don’t think women care so much about looks or money at all.
    They look for what they themselves are lacking: confidence.

    Also, being a good strong provider and protecter helps a lot.
    As does having a great personality.
    And being sexually compatible, that’s a big one.

    I know a lot of guys that are bitter and resentful and think they are never going to find a good woman.
    And they probably won’t. Not because of their looks or status, but because they are no fun to be around.

    They often lack selfesteem, because they get rejected all the time. They are, as Cesar Milan would say, insecure dominant.
    Women are good in picking up on these things, and they will lose respect for the man, who is really a boy.

    After all, if you don’t respect and love yourself, how can she?

  4. cyt
    cyt says:

    yes agree, most of men are single today in htis current time and period and there are still alot of unmarried women around or both are still single

  5. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    Nowadays women aren’t like the past at all since today they have so many unrealistic very high outrageous expectations, along with their very high standards as well. These type of women will just grow very old all alone with a bunch of Cats when their time comes.

  6. BILL
    BILL says:

    The clothing one has always been a pet peeve of mine. I have a natural aversion to caring about clothes , fashion, style, swagger, ect… And I just don’t understand why this is so mportant to women, Anyone can put on clothes it’s freaking stupid. Even if I don’t have any fashion sense I can just copy wjhat the other guys are doing or get someone who does and show me how to dress. I can even take the clothes that another guy is wearing that is deemed cool and put them on my dog, are the women going to date my dog now because he has swagger????

    But beyond that why does this even matter? Especially when the styles change every day or at least every generation. We’ve all know people who grew up in the 60’s or 70’s and they look at pictures of themselves dressed as hippies or disco kings and say “I can’t believe I used to dress like that.” Yeah it was stupid and today 20 years from know everyone will look back to today and say the same thing. Why are we not wearing Togas anymore? And who decided that a suit and tie is what a “proffessional” wears?

    Back in the caveman days females didn’t sit around looking at males and say “oh he has a crappy brown bear skin pelt jacket, not him” “but that guy over there has the silver tip grizzly bear skin, he’s the man!” Clothing was invented for a purpose, protection from the elements and hygenic reasons. Not to be a fashion statement or some status symbol. Women today are choosing guys for abstract crap like clothes, fashion and swaggar over good genetics and this is contributing to the dysgenic trend we have today in the west.

  7. ThisIsWhyUsGoodMenAreSingleToday
    ThisIsWhyUsGoodMenAreSingleToday says:

    Well there is a very excellent reason why many of us good men are rejected by women. First of all it does take two to tango nowadays since the women now have really changed for the worst of all unfortunately. Most women do prefer rich men today more than ever since they like to be really treated like a real princess since they know that these men will spend a lot of money on them so that they can get the very nice gifts they want. And most of the women of today to begin with are nothing but users and losers anyway since they will take advantage of these men that are willing to spend the money on them as well. And after they’re done with these men which then they will move on to the next man unfortunately since these type of very pathetic loser women are just Golddiggers to begin with. And God forbid if many of us good men were that lucky to meet a good woman that can Accept us for who we really are which it is very difficult today for many women to Accept the man for himself since they have become so very greedy, selfish, spoiled, and very money hungry as well over these years. Women have really Changed today which will certainly explain why many of us good men are still single now since they’re very much to Blame for that. And for the women that have their Careers nowadays which they’re the worst of all now since they will only want the very best of all and will never settle for less either. Thank God for the women in the good old days since most of them back then were the very best of all compared to these women today. Now i really know why our family members were very blessed to meet one another back then since real love in those days did come very easy too.

  8. Michael Liebers
    Michael Liebers says:

    Well the world has changed many years ago a Christian man doesn’t do good with a worldly women and I was a victim of domestic violence as a man and truly believe both sexes need to look out.

  9. roughlyyes
    roughlyyes says:

    Facial characteristics, race and height are the big dealbreakers in today’s world. Note: I’m only going to talk about white women in this article since they seem to have the most bargaining power over men compared to everyone else and that makes them ideal for the study. Most women are well-fed, have access to basic jobs and are protected by the police force in modern America so they don’t have to care about getting a provider type. In fact women are often more vocal and vicious in demanding these things from the opposite sex than men. This is why many males have the experience of being laughed at or dismissed with aplomb by beautiful young women, the females have the right to do so and do not have to worry about social repercussions affecting their sexual legacy. The females expect to be impregnated by an alpha no matter what they do. As long as they’re nordic looking, young, don’t get fat or have their kinky side get revealed to the public the females can do whatever they want really. Yelling, screaming, DUIs, stupid tattoos, who cares? Men that are laughed at are often shunned by all of the females in a group, destroying their potential for mating hence the fears of rejection.

    Basically with female independence women have turned men into three groups, nice guys, bad boys and ugly guys. The good, the bad and the ugly. Nice guys to women are good-looking men without assertiveness, they have the potential to be aggressive leaders because of their looks but don’t exploit them. Bad Boys are good looking men who have assertiveness and devil may care attitude because they know they’re good looking. Lastly you have ugly guys. Ugly guys are simply guys that are not considered at all, be they fat, short, ethnic or frail. It doesn’t matter if they are good or bad, all that matters is that they are ugly. So nice guy and bad boy are two sides of the good-looking coin. Ugly is a hopeless gutter. Most guys in these discussion boards erroneously label themselves as “nice guys” when they are actually ugly. The infuriating thing is that women will assign over 80% of the men they meet to the ugly category due to the fact that the females don’t have to care about jobs, bills or debt anymore (unless they have kids, but only the losers date single mothers). This is why modern day America is a feast or famine dilemma for men in the dating realm, either you have what the females want or you don’t and the consolation prize females, i.e. obese single mothers, if you were to mate with one would guarantee your children end up in the gutter of life with bad genes and mocked at looks. The worst part is what women want is assigned by lotto at birth for the males. Some guys got it, some guys don’t. Most don’t.

    In today’s world women appear to search for men like men search for women; on looks and race primarily (and then height). The issue is that women often are so exacting in what they want that they ignore huge swaths of the males and cluster around roughly 10% of the genetic winners knowing that easy jobs or a beta will be there to raise the offspring if the alpha doesn’t commit. Money and status seem to only affect female mate choice marginally and this can be seen with several celebrity males famous for playing comic relief roles or villains; often their wives are plain jane doorstops despite their millions.


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