The question “Does he like me?” has vexed and perplexed girls and women from elementary schools to nursing homes. How many times have you yourself asked that iconic question, wondering whether the guy you’d really like to get to know better feels the same way about you? And how many hours, days … maybe months (years?) have you wasted in deep thought and analysis, alone and with your friends and trusted advisers, trying to figure out the answer?
If it’s any consolation, you’re not alone. According to Google, the phrase “does he like me” is “googled” almost 50,000 times a month in the US. In real life you can probably add another zero to the end of that figure.
My mission here today is to end this madness and give you, once and for all, the answer you’ve been seeking. The answer is … drumroll …. if you have to ask “does he like me”, then the answer is no.
Guys are not as complicated as you might make them out to be. If a guy likes you, assuming that you’ve got a bit of self awareness and an ounce of intuition, you’ll know it.
If you can’t tell whether a guy likes you or not, there are three possibilities:
1. He doesn’t like you.
If he doesn’t like you, there isn’t much you can do to change that. Sure his feelings for you might change (maybe like a 2% chance), but that’ll need to happen on its own. Since you have no idea why he feels the way he does, there’s no way to know what to do in any case. Of course, this probably won’t stop you from trying, and I guess it’s something that you need to do. So give it your best shot, but pleeeeeeeze don’t waste more than a week trying.
Be direct. Come out in the open and let him know how you feel. You’ve got nothing to lose. If it doesn’t work, then you’ve saved yourself a ton of wasted time and energy. And if, by some chance, he changes his tune in the future, he’ll be the first to let you know.
2. He does like you, but he is unavailable to get involved in a relationship with you.
Just because a man likes you doesn’t mean that he is interested in a relationship with you. He might be dating someone, or recovering from a bad relationship, or simply not interested in being in a relationship with anyone.
Imagine that the situation was reversed and that you were dating someone when you met a guy you liked. You wouldn’t just dump your boyfriend for the new guy, would you? Not if you were happy with your relationship. But that doesn’t mean that you didn’t like the new guy. You were just unavailable. And when a man is unavailable, you want to steer clear.
3. He does like you, but he is too much of a wimp and wuss to let you know.
Seriously, is that the type of guy you are looking to be in a relationship with? If he likes you and is interested in a relationship, he’ll ask you out.
Bottom Line: Does he like me?
You can make up hundreds of excuses to explain why he really does like you even though he isn’t telling you so clearly and asking you out. But let me ask you an important question, which I need you to answer 100% honestly: are you looking to be in a relationship or are you looking to play games?
If you’d rather play games, then I suggest you read one of the hundreds of dating and relationship blogs that will tell you how to seduce or trap a man using all sorts of tricks and techniques worthy of Hollywood blockbusters, or at least an HBO series.
But if you are truly interested in being in a relationship with a man whom you love (or at least like) and respect, then quit the games, drop the losers and playboys (emphasis on “boys”) and start taking dating and relationships seriously. Reading this blog is a good start.
And remember, if you have to ask “does he like me?”, then the answer is almost always NO.